Love suffers long and is kind (1 Corinthians 13:4a).
As I reflected on Paul's description of love as being kind, I realized that it is often the little things that we fail to do for one another. This is especially true in marriage. We husbands are great at bragging that we would die for our wives, but we often fail to perform the little acts of kindness that are motivated out of love. It is so easy for me to take Donna for granted and fail to show loving kindness in the little things of life. As I thought about this I came across a great quote from Les and Leslie Parrott.
Les and Leslie Parrott are the co-directors of the Center for Relationship Development at Seattle Pacific University. Les is a professor of clinical psychology; Leslie is a marriage and family therapist. I have benefited from many of their books on marriage and counseling. Read their observation on the meaning of kindness. Then find a way to show your spouse a little kindness today.
"Kindness comes from small behaviors. We don't think of big donations or grand contributions as 'kind.' We call them 'generous' or 'benevolent,' but it's the small things we call 'kind.' Kindness, for example, comes when we turn down our partner's side of the bed before crawling into it ourselves. Kindness comes when we re-adjust the car seat after driving so our partner doesn't have to. Or when we load the dishwasher when it's not our turn. Kindness comes from a million small behaviors that enhance the life of the one we love. That's why Kenneth Wuest's translation of Paul's love poem underscores the gentle kindness of love as 'mellowing all which would have been harsh and austere.' Kindness sets aside fear that we'll be exploited. It relinquishes self-focus and is energized by the needs of another. Kindness causes us to pause from our own pursuits in order to augment somebody else's life. Once we remove kindness from a loving heart it's only a matter of time before the heart atrophies and love is lost altogether." Adapted from Love Is … (Zondervan, 1999).
What are some ways you show kindness to others? What are some kind things your spouse has done for you?
